Shamelessly swiped from elsewhere, because my brains feeling mushy tonight (but I've got an extra 2k on AW done, woo, go me!):
1) Did you fart? Cuz you blew me away.
2) Are yer parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special.
3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it in.
4) Do you have a library card? Cuz I'd like to sign you out.
5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? Cuz I can see myself in em.
6) If you was a tree and I was a Squirrel, I'd store my nuts in yer hole.
7) You might not be the best lookin' girl here, but beauty's only a light switch away.
8) Man - "Fat Penguin!" Woman - "WHAT?" Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."
9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.
10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went inta this cheap motel room.
11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin, we kin sleep til afternoon.
And.... the most tackiest for last!
13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up!
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
13 absolutely, positively horrible Redneck pickup lines
Posted by Anne D at 9:13 PM
Labels: 13, thursday 13, Thursday thirteen
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22 comments:
ROFL. I always enjoy bad Red Neck jokes
Thanx for the laugh.
Ed Davis
Wow, those are pretty bad. Boy am I glad no one's ever used one of those on me.
Sad as it is, I've actually heard a variation on #5.
The worst attempted pick-up line I've heard is when I've told a guy "sorry, I'm married" and he responds "well, I don't see him here with you now, do I?" Several different sleazebags have tried this one on me, yikes! Just because I'm in a bar having drinks with my girlfriends does NOT mean I'm interested in cheating on my husband, thank you very much!
LMFAO!
Wrench...lol
Too funny! Anything red-neck makes me giggle because I have Jeff Foxworthy's voice in my head.
LOL
Great list!
*lol* I love jokes about my neighbors.
LMAO!!!
You had me at the first. HA!!
Loved your TT!
Funny list!! Happy TT!
Funny.. how about "how do you like your eggs, poached, scrambled or fertilized?"
ROFL
omg. Light switch away. Love it!
Whoa. We can sleep till afternoon. That's classic. (and something Trevor would say!)
Those rock, Anne. And congrats on the extra word count -- you deserve a mushy brain for that!
Lmao!
Those are awful!!!!!!!!!!! And yet terribly funny! hehehe The window cleaner one is priceless.
ROFL!!! I love #6. That one makes me giggle silly.
Those are great, LOL! Thanks -- I needed a belly laugh this morning.
Great list. Had me giggling.
Great list. Thanks for the laugh.
Hah! That's a funny list. What I wouldn't give to be able to use one of those in a story!
Happy TT!
You know, I might just have to try do that. Can you imagine the hero waltzing up and using "You've got windex blue eyes?"
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