*SNORT*

To brighten up your Monday:

Vibrator robber jailed over raid

Jex concealed the sex toy in a carrier bag, pretending it was a gun
A robber who held up a bookmaker's shop in Leicester with his girlfriend's vibrator has been jailed.
Nicki Jex, 27, of Braunstone, Leicester, hid the sex toy in a carrier bag pretending it was a gun, Leicester Crown Court heard.

The manager at Ladbrokes in Narborough Road handed over more than £600 in cash when he pointed it at her on 27 December 2006, the court heard.

On Monday, Jex, who pleaded guilty to robbery, was jailed for five years.

Sentencing him, Judge Philip Head said: "It's right to record that you did not have a firearm but you pretended you had and intended that those you confronted believed that you did, and it must have been truly terrifying for them at the time." . . .

And this which takes me back to the days when all these songs were king!: